While I feel relatively confident that I can probably just post that Time Magazine cover by itself with maybe a picture of this crazy b@st@rd standing over the body of Oscar De La Hoya and it will tell the story, over the years you guys have come to expect a minimum word count from me on these sorts of articles, so perhaps some more stuff on the subject is in order.
Back in the dark days of late 90s, when the terrifying demons of the Arroyo administration possessed much of the country in its unbreakable curse, San Miguel Corporation sponsored a boxing “reality show” titled Blow by Blow. This underrated but totally epic show goes around the country hoping to capture a good raw boxing match. Well, they freakin’ overshoot! They effin’ found the boxer that would end the gaddam careers of the best fu***n’ fighters boxing has ever known – DE LA HOYA, HATTON, MARQUEZ, and MORALES f*c**n’ twice.
You have to understand that the boxers I mentioned wipe out world record after world record. These guys flipped out like crazy hard, and in under a decade they successfully knocked out more than five hundred boxers. This is a significant number no matter what you’re talking about, but it carries a little extra gut-punching weight when you realize they get paid at least a million effin’ dollars to do so. Last time I punched someone, I spent an all-nighter in a gaddam prison.
Nike's controversial ad of Pacquiao
Pacquiao wasn’t off to a good start. His parents separated and they were poor – a part of the country’s 60% population seventy seven levels below poverty level. He grew up in Mindanao where children war games consisted of authentic machine guns and .45 pistols. Gunshots were constantly fired that he slept on the floor, studied reading and writing on the floor, and on the rare occasions they had money to do so – he freakin’ ate on the gaddam floor. He probably studied boxing so he can just punch whoever fires on the direction of his house. He does not have a college degree nor a high school degree.
His professional debut was a against Edmund “Enting” Ignacio January 1995. He won via decision. After a series of hits and misses, his big break came in when he stepped into the fight as a late replacement and won the fight by technical knockout to become the IBF Super Bantamweight champion on a bout held at MGM Grand, Las Vegas, Nevada.
Well he liked that. He liked that so much he defended this title five times and fought to a sixth-round draw against Agapito Sánchez in a bout that was stopped early after he received 2 headbutts.
Nobody put a whole lot of faith on Pacquaio though. He was this unsophisticated, uneducated, undernourished, predictable fighter from the province who is in boxing to put food on the table… floor… wherever the h3ll he eats those days. Well, Pacquiao beat the holy hell out of Barrera to show the doubters they’re in for a ride. That match officially made him awesome. Freddie Roach’s training made him awesomer.
What made me totally respect Pacquaio is his share of defeats/disappointments. He went on to fight Marquez whom he knocked down three times in the first round. The fight ended in a draw after a judge admitted to making a mistake in scoring the first round. A bigger defeat came when he lost his first bout to Morales by a unanimous decision.
He won his next fight versus Hector Velasquez but it didn’t make him awesomely happy. It ain’t Vegas and it certainly ain’t Morales. By this time, Roach is so deep into Pacquiao already and the whole world was witnessing his transition into a sophisticated killing machine.
Pacquiao finally got his revenge against Morales January 21, 2006 in gaddam Las Vegas. KO 10th round. Eat that suck3r! Just to get extra awesome points, he fought Morales again after one fight with a guy named Larios. The final episode of the Pacquiao-Morales trilogy ended with a knock out in the 3rd round in… you guessed it… Las Vegas.
After a short-lived contract controversy with Golden Boy Promotions in 2006, he was named Fighter of the Year by Ring Magazine and HBO .
After knocking down Solis, Pacquaio saw a familiar face going against him, Barrera. Pacquiao – altogether now – won.
In 2008, Pacquiao became the flag bearer of the Philippines at the 2008 Summer Olympics. He became the first Filipino Olympic non-participant to be Team Philippines’ flag-bearer. Swimmer Miguel Molina, 2005 Southeast Asian Games’ Best Male Athlete, yielded the honor to Pacquiao, who the f*** wouldn’t?
Pacquiao faced Marquez again in a match dubbed “UNFINISHED BUSINESS”. He won via a disputed split decision. Márquez’s camp called for an immediate rematch but Pacquiao, said “I don’t think so, this business is over” because he was on his way to defeating David Dias even when it meant going up the weight class. The sacrifice paid off with a ninth round knock out. With the victory, he is not just awesome, he became badass.
He became the ONLY Filipino and Asian boxer to win four major titles in four weight classes and also became the first Filipino fighter to ever win a world title at Lightweight.
Oh, and just to impress you more – he went home with $3M. Eventually, he appeared in an international commercial for Nike together with athletic greats such as Bryant and Federer. He even has his own billboard in f*c**n’ Los Angeles, California gaddamit.
Still, this unstoppable powerhouse of boxing superstars-clearing insanity wasn’t going to be any less determined to prove he is the best freakin’ fighter of modern history. He faced Oscar De La Hoya. December 6, 2008 was the date. MG effin’ M Grand Las Vegas was the place.
The “DREAM MATCH” turns out to be De La Hoya’s nightmare. Pacquiao smashed the pretty boy’s face so hard, they ended up looking alike by the end of the freakin’ match.
It was a non-title bout but who the hell gives a fu**?! He went home with over $30M. This is also the fight that earned him the BEST POUND FOR POUND FIGHTER OF ALL TIME title. In layman’s term – if all fighters are of the same weight and built, Pacquiao would emerge the best. Hell yeah!
Now, just in case there are doubters out there, Pacquiao agreed to face Hatton in that gaddam MGM Grand. That place now holds a special meaning to all boxing greats, this is the place Pacquiao made them appreciate the intricate celing design. Well, some of them landed face down but you get the drift.
That intro is longer than the match. Because after a four(?)-day special by HBO about Hatton and Pacquiao, the fight ended with a knock out at the end of the second round. Pacquiao was barely scratched, Hatton saw stars.
They say that fight against the returning-from-the-dead Mayweather Jr. is the fight of his lifetime. It is the fight that will seal the deal of his career. If he wins against the scary Black dude, he would have reached his destiny. Before he even gets a chance on that he needs to get through Cotto first.
I honestly don’t freakin’ think so. I think Cotto and Mayweather, Jr. are the ones who have everything on the line. Pacquiao is made, up there, sealed tight as a spaceship door. His fights are better than Christmas because it does not only clear traffic from EDSA to Times Street, New York, it clears countries of crimes. He proved that dreams come true, if you are disciplined enough, determined enough, and wise enough, dreams come true.
He is a clean fighther, too. An honest one. Not the most patient but clean. He delivers no low blow, butts no head, says no dirty word. He just does what a boxer is supposed to do, throw the strongest punch you can throw at every opportunity you get.
He didn’t only put the Philippines on the map, he wiped out other gaddam countries as well. Put him against any one from any country and Pacquiao IS CERTAINLY BETTER – pound for fu*kin’ pound.
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